30 January 2005

Equus and the Speedophile

A fine weekend spent in the picturesque Berkshire countryside, accompanied by Ava Moore - the young one that I claim working families tax credit for, not the actress. I must say though, I've forgiven Femmke whatsit, and extend a warm open invitation should she wish to come and make ammends. There are some lovely local churches and country walks. Best of all, if she's a fan of trains, we could stroll over to Ufton Nervet for a look at the railway crossing.
Young Ava and I visited our favourite places, fed the friendly horses with grass and polos which they nuzzled from our hands. It's difficult to get close to a horse without thinking of Equus - fortunately I controlled myself.
A visit to the swimming pool provided a pleasant hours entertainment. Toddlers learning to swim, splashing about in armbands, while hairy backed fathers beamed with pride and floated like water buffalo. Not me obviously. 'I am an smooth man'.
One slightly worrying fellow...It's hard not to slip into Sun reader mentality occasionally. Didn't seem to be with anybody, just basking in the shallow end. I felt rather guilty about my immediate judgement of him as a ...what's the word - speedophile. It takes a lot of guts ( no pun intened )to go swimming alone if you're a single overweight male with nothing but exercise on your mind. As he pounded the water with what I believe to have been a butterfly stroke, the radio station playing over the pool's tannoy system, which until that moment had been easy to ignore background muzak- delivered its contribution to the procedings. Hearing Michael Jackson's 'The way you make me Feel' played in a smimming pool filled with small children and hairybacked men in goggles and shorts is nothing short of chilling. I wonder if he'd requested it?
Anyway, good night, I'm off to form a lynchmob and howl at the moon

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