17 March 2005

University Challenge Part 2

So where were we? Alex arrived, ate some sandwiches and began to perk up.
So far so good. A trip to make up - even suave gentlemen with fine complexions like ours, require a bit of slap...just for those close up shots. People might mistake it for the moonlandings otherwise.
I won't go on about the studio, the sets, the huge audience - my mother up in the top row, and the imposing figure of Jeremy Paxman. All this seemed somehow less terrifying than the fact that our opponents were - The Financial Times. Oh shit. Well we didn't really expect Wayne Rooney and his mates, but this was a little bit perplexing. How very ironic. So here we are, a lifestyle on trial - about to be shown up by the pink paper.
A few warm up questions to acquaint our fingers with the buzzers - I kept my fingers well away from it, in case I was accidentally called upon to answer a question.
Then it began. "Hello, my name is John Moore and I am the Sports Editor" - Well at least I got that right. Eyes down fora full house, and away we went.
Started for ten. Wow, we buzzed first. Rowley Leigh knew the answer. Then we got the bonuses...On it went. Idler Leigh...Idler Leigh - really quite astounding. Was there anything he didn't know?
Then i got a question right...about recycled plastic - where did that come from? Got the cricket questions, Brunel, standard guage railways. Bugger, the FT started getting a few...a lot actually. I think we shocked them, but they were waking up now.
I couldn't see the score but i felt we were still just ahead. I was still too terrified to risk a starter - even though I knew a few. Alex fearlessly went in a bit early a couple of times and we got docked, but each time it was Rowley to the rescue.
Tom as team captain had to answer the bonuses, but hopefully the mics will pick up our telling him the answers. Especially when he answered Jimmy Saville...'Wrong. That was the Pope' an easy mistake to make.
We got the questions on idling wrong, which drew Paxman smirking ire. Mind you, the FT forgot what monetarism was, so all square.
We demanded the contest be stopped half way through, because a German novelist question was said to be Kafka. Obviously he was a Czech. The questioner came down and said 'Well he wrote in german'. In Unison, Tom and I called out ' Well Beckett wrote in French'. We still lost the point however, when it was decided, that the Czech republic didn't exist then, and was part of the Austrian Hungarian empire. Put the wind up the FT though.
Sadly there were no questions on Britney Spears, so our pop knowledge was not tested.
....bonnnngggggg. That was the gong.
I am honour bound not to give the score or result, but I can intimate. Lazyness triumphed.

Following our triu... we drank steadily and heavily for the rest of the day. Got chased from Coronation Street by security, had dinner with Marc Riley, met Jeremy Paxman and got hammered - what a wonderful man he is.
Alex and I are going to record a single ' The Ballad of University Challenge'.
You have been warned.
Hooray for Cognis by the way.

This is Tom and I discussing the difference between Jimmy Saville and The Pope


Anonymous Anonymous said...

supercrass says:
nice going! congra...(oops carriage in front of the horse). all eyes will be glued to the box to see how you did. i am sure you made us proud.

9:46 AM  
Anonymous Chameleon said...

I enjoyed reading your version of the UCTP experience - watching the match in the Green Room was a nailbiting experience too, believe me! We tried your questions on for size as a warm-up. Our team received the photos with Paxman today as well as the broadcast date - we will definitely watch your match (again!). If you are interested in our version of events (we were on right after you), consult my blog via the link (entry title The Pathetic Wreckage of a Draem, Part Two - Part One includes a couple of photos from the hotel bar with one of your team members). You acquitted yourselves with honour - a fine performance!

9:48 PM  
Anonymous Chameleon said...

Apologies for the typo - it should read "Dream".

9:56 PM  
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10:32 PM  

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