01 July 2005

Ladies Tennis and Terrorism

I've finally thrown in the towel. Given up smoking - well, this is my second day of health and vitality, and the withdrawl symptoms aren't too bad. Up until wednesday, I relished the challenge laid down by a good smoke. Hey lungs - want to fight? However tight my chest was, I refused to let these little things beat me. Recently it has been a struggle to win the fight, so still on top of the world, I have retired from the ring. I will be a lover not a fighter. Let younger lungs continue the struggle, I shall no longer rise to the challenge.
This is in no way a method of restoring fertility - one is quite enough thank you very much. It strikes me, that the post coital cigarette, should be changed to pre - coital, it'd be far more useful. They should teach this in schools. I'll call Ruth Kelly and get her to prepare a document.
So the weekend is almost upon us once again. Having only a lingering lingerie interest in ladies tennis, and no interest whatsoever in Live 8 - except for the possibility of terrorist attrocities and the death of Bono, I shall be looking for more nourishing pastimes. A picnic perhaps...a visit to the seaside. An intelligent conversation...A packet of Golden Virginia...no.no.no.


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